Wordless Wednesday: My Time

I know what I’m looking for out of a man and its someone that will be there full-time. Maybe Divorced Dad and I didn’t work because his full time commitment was to his children.  But us as women need to stop settling for the part-time stuff. If he really wants to be with you he will make time for you.

I haven’t spoken to Divorced Dad since December 30th. We exchanged a few texts on New Year’s Eve, but then I stopped and waited. I used to wake up with texts from him and now its been over a week since he’s even contacted me. Pretty sure he’s not that busy, but that just let me know how much I had been on his mind lately. While it hurts a little, I mean it had been six months and I was falling for him, I guess I’m happy it didn’t go on too much longer.

Singing Saturday: On To the Next One

I thought I was falling for Divorced Dad, and I was going hard. But I've already had a few good dates and meet some new guys, and I realized he's nothing to get upset about. There's more out there, and in the words of Jay-Z, On To the Next One.

Is it the End?

I really liked Divorced Dad. Going out with him was totally awesome, but I think we may have run our course. He has had his kids a lot more recently, but even that doesn't excuse our lack of time together. I haven't seen this guy since December 5. Just hit the four week mark and I'm wondering what I'm doing.

I've had long distance relationships, I mean Texas to Detroit type of distances, and I can't recall going a month without seeing the person. I think what irks me even more about this is that he only lives nine miles away from me. I travel almost 30 miles one way to get to work. Its like having someone so close, but so far at the same time.

Leo 2013 Dating Horoscope

I find horoscopes very interesting. I don't live by them, but I always find the similarities to whats going on in my life to be fascinating. Here's a bit about being a Leo, and most of this does apply to me: Leo people brim with a lot of confidence. Courage, ambition, passion and loyalty are some of the virtues that define any Leo. In matters of love, Leo likes to take an upper hand and keep in control their emotions. The self-regulating and domineering streak in them often makes them a possessive partner. 

My "Dating under the stars" horoscope from Match.com says:

The deeper side of life beckons in 2013. Early in the year you toy with your love interests, basking in their attention and semi-earnest bids for your heart. As the year progresses, however, Saturn will move more insistently into Scorpio and Jupiter will get cozied up in Cancer, making your appetite for variety fade. The desire to find The One will be a new sensation for you — and you’ll find it to be a journey that you really enjoy, you lucky Leo! There’s a real possibility for big love to come into your life this year — the only question is: Are you ready?

Cosmo says:

"Passion will skyrocket for you midyear. That means lots of wild sex and feeling so incredibly in love with someone."

It also says that for the month of January that I need to enact a major change to make my love life smoother. It's also time to have a serious chat about where things are going. Hmmm. 

GaneshaSpeaks.com says

These are interesting times for the Leo singles and few trusted friendships may blossom and a friendship may enter into a totally different dimension of love. This relationship, if forged, will be a source of great strength and support to you. It may also happen that someone special may be totally bowled over by you. This sounds good. However, that someone special may also need you so much that he or she may refuse to see their life beyond you. In other words, they may become quite dependent on you. Hence you should know where to draw the line.

As a Leo, I'm often wooed easily by flattery, so I found this piece to be very interesting: Don’t get carried away by infatuations and only allow true love to enter your heart. Only give importance to such kind of relationships that have the potential to grow and can be enhanced further. So if I'm reading all of these horoscopes right, and believe me I read more than I actually posted, I may be falling in love this year.  There may be some rough times before I meet that special someone, but this may be the year for Mr. Right. What do you guys think?

Blogged Up Married Guy

Ha, I must’ve been talking about Married Guy too much, because who booty called me Friday night at 1a.m.? Married Guy of course. He first sent a text that I ignored. He then called me 10 minutes later, and I let him know that I was seeing someone and wasn’t really interested sleeping with him. We hung up, but I had never been happier that I met Divorced Dad (just going to start calling him “D”) until then. I realized if I hadn’t met him, I probably would’ve hooked up with MG again.

I thought about how great the sex with MG used to be, but I don’t want to mess things up with D, just because of some sex. Plus what I have with D is so much different. He appreciates and praises me, he makes me feel special and loved and I’m so happy when I’m around him, that I don’t even want to ruin that. Anyways, I hadn’t been with MG since September of 2010, but it wasn’t for a lack of trying.

Married Guy, Year Two

I will continue on with my story about Married Guy. He was in my life for a very long time, and I should’ve let him go much earlier. But I, like probably many other women, got sucked deeper and deeper into the relationship.

Kids are Cramping My Style

So I really like Divorced Dad. It’s been four months and really feels that he knows me better than some of my best friends. He’s an absolute sweetheart and I love spending time with him. Only problem is, I rarely get to spend time with him.

He loves his kids, and I adore that. But the kids are his first priority, and I was hoping to meet a guy where I would be his number one. Technically, I’m like number four or five, because I think the job even comes before me. With this joint physical custody, he literally has the kids four nights a week. Sometimes more, since the mom will take the kids back when he’s at work, she doesn’t count those hours towards his time.

Dating a Divorced Dad

It's been four months since DW and I met and started going out. Things seem to have moved pretty quickly, much to my surprise. The night we met we talked about kids, I really don't know how it came up, but I can't lie- I was pretty tanked that night. I told him that I didn't have kids and didn't really like them. Of course as I'm running my big fat mouth, I didn't know that the had three kids.

OMG I'm Dating Someone

A little while ago I spoke about meeting a guy when I least expected it. It was a pleasant surprise, and when I wrote that post I had only known the guy for a week or so. We had crazy physical attraction to each other. But honestly when we met, I expected it to be a one night kind of thing. After not being physical with a guy in almost eight months, I had actually went back and called Married Guy.

Lucky for me, Married Guy was so busy sleeping with everyone else, that he hadn't quite made it around to see me. If I had hooked up with married guy, I probably wouldn't have kept my options open for another person.There was something about Married Guy that would satisfy me for the time being. That was until I met DW.

Manscaping

I am a firm believer that women should shave their underarms, legs and bikini area. But I also believe that men are responsible for a little manscaping themselves. That doesn't mean just shaving their beard, but also taking care of underarm and pubic hair. Yes, I just said that.

Some men make jokes when women don't shave their legs or underarms for a couple weeks in the winter. But do men realize how unattractive a bushy underarm with deodorant balls can be? Every time I see all that hair, I just wonder if the deodorant is actually making it to the skin. Can the deodorant actually work if it is just sitting in the hair?

Secondly, I like when a guy takes care of the hair down there. For me its a matter of hygiene. It makes for a much better experience when going down. Hair holds smells and sweat. Shaving really cuts down on that. And it doesn't need to be completely shaven clean, but neat hair of a bushy mess is always helpful.

Finally, for many guys, shaving down there will actually make it look bigger. This really doesn’t mean much for women, but it gives many men a huge ego boost. I was talking to a good guy friend and we were talking about manscaping. He said he noticed that all the guys in porns were shaving and was wondering if he should do the same. Of course I encouraged it. I’ve been lucky enough that most men I’ve dated did their manscaping. A couple weeks later he called me. He said that first he tried cutting the hair with scissors, but but almost cut himself. He then grabbed his clippers and took care of the rest. You should’ve heard the excitement in his voice. He actually called me to say, “it looks so huge now!”

I know that I truly appreciate manscaping, however what do you do when you are dating someone that doesn’t do it? I’ve been with this guy for over three months now and I’m not quite sure how to bring it up. I’ve never had to before, because all the guys I dated just naturally did it. The odd thing, is that he actually shaves his chest hair, so I know there are clippers around! How do I bring it up gently so that he takes care of his underarms and other area?

Married Guy, Finding Out

So me and married guy had been dating for about seven months. Things were good. We went and had fun. He spent the night at my house and I spent the night at his a few times. We spoke on the phone, both house and cell, at all times of the night. I was really falling in love with this guy. He was sweet and attentive. We had a lot in common, despite the 14 year age difference. And we had a lot of fun when we went out. Plus the sex was awesome. I was young, so of course I was being introduced to things I had never done before.

I knew that dating a married man was wrong,
but what happens when you think you're in love?

A few months after we began dating, I quit my job and was looking for another one, but I still hadn't finished college, so my experience was limited to some time I spent as an office assistant then sales person. Married guy was a recruiter, and soon began helping me with my resume and lining up job interviews for me. After a really great interview with an auto supplier, I decided to meet him at his office for lunch.

Married Guy, The Meeting

A lot of women have gotten involved with a married guy. I've learned it doesn't matter your social status, age or even location. Why it happens may be for a variety of reasons, but here's my story of the married guy that was the center of my world for way too much of my life. And here's the story on how we meet....

Stuck in Time

I think everyone has something that an ex has gave them. Perhaps its a small memento like a card or photo. Or maybe it was a nice purse, watch or other expensive gift. But if the person is an ex, why are you holding on the item. Is it because of what it costs or what it signifies?

Is Age Just a Number?

I recently turned 32 and I was fine with it, for about a week. Then I realized, that I am not where I intended my life being. Thought I would be married, or at least have some prospects, and soon be having kids. My career is finally on the correct path, and I have a beautiful home, but my personal life has been in shambles.

Most of the men my age are married, or getting their first divorce and very bitter. I don't know when I was supposed to go out and meet a guy. I spent years working day jobs and going to college at night, so my college was much different than most. There were no guys to meet there. And the ones that I did meet have moved out of state or are married.

When Least Expected

I've always heard that saying, it will come when you least expect it. I've been trying to believe that for a few years now. If I stop looking for a relationship, one will eventually come to me. So I stopped looking, or did I? Have I always really gone to events wondering how many single guys were there or who the cute guy at the bar may have come with. Perhaps I've spent time when I was out complaining to friends that there are no single guys here and its becoming frustrating. 

Work Hour to Happy Hour

Working in PR and events, I often have to go out right after work. I also find meeting a guy for drinks after work less intimidating than meeting for dinner. Have you ever found that if you go home after work, that you may not get back out the house? This happens to me all the time.

I often carry my makeup bag and some cute shoes in my car. I don't wear makeup at work often (there are no guys here to impress, lol). So just throwing on some eyeliner makes me look great. If I'm really trying to make an impression, I may even put in my contacts.

My go to for going out after work is to wear some black pants and find a cute shirt to bring with me to work. But here are some great tips from the professionals on what you can do to go from Work Hour to Happy Hour.

Laws of Attraction

Everyone one has a type that they find attractive. Sometimes that type changes over time or you go phases. For awhile, most of the guys I dated were tall, dark skinned, muscular with a shaved head. There was usually a motorcycle involved too, but that's another story for another post.

As of lately, I really don't know what my type of guy is. I'm not gravitating towards one particular look or type of guy. I've even started dating more white, hispanic and middle eastern guys. I've spent years dating only black men. Luckily black men come in all different shades so you could end up with one as dark and fine as Idris Elba or the other side spectrum like Jesse Williams. But that is a beauty of black men, there are so many different shades and types.

So what if you aren't physically attracted to someone right away? I've said before that someone has grown on me, but that usually meant their personality or some other quirk they have. As I have gotten older I realize that I don't want someone's personality to grow on me. I want someone that I click with right away.

Facebook Confirmation

If you chose to put your information out on the web for anyone to see, I don’t think what I’m doing is stalking. I consider it more to be confirming facts. People can’t tell a whole lot of lies on facebook because they will quickly get called out. A lot of people are also very open, and even if you aren’t, someone on your friend list is bound to be.

First off, Facebook privacy is very ready to navigate. You can hide certain posts or pictures from friends. You can also change how your wall is viewed. If it’s not a friend, shut the wall down. Also hide your friends posts from outside people if you make public status updates. Its your friends that are most likely to give hints up on YOUR life.

Old College Try

Have you ever looked back in your dating life and wondered why you and a person didn’t work out? You are drawing blanks trying to remember what happened...

During college, I dated this guy Mike. We only went out a few times, but of course ended up having sex. Me, not being completely over my ex, of course sabotaged what ever relationship we could have had. Of course he remembers the exchange differently than I do. I guess I ended up cussing him out (this happens frequently, so I don’t remember, lol).

We remained friends through everything. And when we graduated, he came to my graduation party where we partied throughout the night. The guy that I was dating was there, but I was having more fun with Mike. He was always cute, and had the deepest dimples when he smiled.

Warning, this post is long!

Turn Offs: Shy Guy

So I've talked a lot about the guy from the bar. I thought of giving him an alias, but this is probably the last time I will talk about him, so he's not worth it now, lol. If you've seen the other posts "Who's On First" and "Who's on First Update", you can learn what was going on with this cutie I saw at the bar a couple months ago.

Well, I gave him my card and didn't ask for his contact information. It took a while for him to contact me (you would know this if you read Who's on First Update, lol). So here's the run down of what happened when he finally contacted me.